I am a member of few groups online for Mothers’ with disabilities. Lately, there has been negativity in the groups which prompted me to think back over the last 5 years. I can honestly say we have not run in to any negativity!
Reminiscing over the last 5 years. I began thinking about when I was pregnant and I would often worry how our son would adjust to life with two parents with physical disabilities.
I can remember sitting in a restaurant going well this is the last time we will be able to go out and eat and thinking that our social life would be over. I wasn’t worried about Jacob screaming or throwing things. But rather, how I would physically handle him out in public, feeding him, changing him etc. Also, I was worried how Glenn and I would be perceived as parents. Heck, sometimes when we go out with “able-body” friends’ servers often ask our “abled-body” friends what I’d like to order.
Thankfully, society has proved me wrong and put those worries to rest. Glenn and I have always taken Jacob out with us and rarely are we asked questions. Yes, there were times when I would have Jacob in the shopping cart and people would ask if he was my child. When this happened, I would think to myself, “No, he was on aisle 5, can I buy him.” But, instead, I smile and proudly say yes.
Jacob’s potential behavior also worried me; would it be different because of our disabilities? I wondered if he would learn how to take advantage of us such as run from us and do things to exploit our inabilities. Don’t get me wrong, Jacob is definitely a typical little boy – he has his moments where he will see how far he can push the boundaries. But he has never used our disabilities against us. In fact, if I start counting down and say “5!” in stern voice or if Glenn just says his name sternly he knows he’s in trouble and he’ll usually straighten up right then.
I want to believe that our positive experiences are a result of how Glenn and I carry ourselves mixed with societal changes. Maybe even a little intervention from a higher being.